'She said that me posting about it on Facebook would overshadow her post': Marathon runner accuses friend of stealing the spotlight after friend joins race at the last minute

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Nov 5, 2024 11:00 AM EST

This marathon runner has a real case of jealousy, which must be confusing to the thousands of other people who also ran in the same race. 

U/Kiwi-Foreign has been put in an awkward position by their friend, and they're not really sure if they did the right thing or not. As they tell it, they knew their friend was running in a marathon, which of course can take months of training. A lot of runners tell those around them that they're training: it's a point of pride, and running the marathon is the light at the end of the tunnel. Well, this person skipped all the training and decided to run the race just for funsies. They figured they'd be running with their friend for most of the time, but that's not what ended up happening. 

As commenters pointed out, the friend had no need to feel jealous about the original poster running in the race. Thousands of people from all over the world join the race, and they're all entitled to make social media posts sharing their big accomplishment. Others admonished the original poster for their sneaky way of getting into the race (by taking someone else's bib, which is a big no-no in the racing community). You can check out this marathon drama down below, and see if you side with the original poster's last-minute running idea, or the friend whose jealousy has taken over their friendship. 

Up next, let's take a peek behind the counter at these fresh-baked bakery mistakes, like one person who was bemused to find their cookie cakes read "Happy Brithday." 

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    1292
    via Capstone Events via Unsplash+

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITA for signing up for a marathon last minute when my friend wants running to be “her thing” I (38) recently signed up for a marathon a week before the race, after finding out I would need rotator cuff surgery. I haven't been able to climb, which is my first love, but have always enjoyed running casually. I've done a few races before, one marathon (without training) so I
    via u/Kiwi-Foreign
  • 03
    felt like I could probably do it again, and it's something that keeps me motivated and gives me a sense of accomplishment, especially as I'm preparing for an upcoming surgery. My friend was planning to run the marathon but hadn't trained until the week of. I figured we could both run really slowly together.
    via u/Kiwi-Foreign
  • 04
    The whole week I was trying to find a bib, I told her that I was planning to sign up too. She was fine with that until I told her I finally found a bib, she got really upset. I had posted on Facebook saying I was going to run it last minute and she FREAKED OUT.
    via u/Kiwi-Foreign
  • 05
    She told me that running this marathon was "her thing" and feels like I'm trying to take over something that's special to her. She said that me posting about it on Facebook would overshadow her post. I never saw it that way— I just thought we could even support each other during the run. She accused me of being a friend, and just said some really terrible things to me.
    via u/Kiwi-Foreign
  • 06
    At the run itself, I lost her at the first mile. I texted her like 5 times, called her 3 times. She ignored them all. She called me two house later and she's 3 miles behind me and tells me to stop and wait for her. At this point I had decided to run the marathon for myself and I'd see her at the end so I said no. Which she insists is a sign that I am a selfish and unsupportive friend.
    via u/Kiwi-Foreign
  • 07
    She was so mad that I was ahead of her that she quit at mile 16 and cut the course the finish with a better time than me. Which I mean, is fine. I finished in 6:15 and was proud of myself in the end.
    via u/Kiwi-Foreign
  • 08
    She is insistent that running is "her thing" and says I'm not allowed to engage in it, which feels literally insane to me. She was originally going to help me with post-surgery stuff, but now she's decided not to, saying she feels "betrayed" by me doing the marathon. I don't feel like running a race should be something that "belongs" to one person, especially since it's something I love, too. But maybe
    via u/Kiwi-Foreign
  • 09
    I missed something in how I approached it. AITA for signing up for a marathon even though my friend feels like I'm stepping on her turf?
    via u/Kiwi-Foreign
  • 10
    Was it of me to run the marathon when my friend wanted it to be her thing?
    via u/Kiwi-Foreign
  • 11
    Maezymable NTA. This is absolutely bizarre. A true enthusiast of any sport wants everyone to join in.. she's an insecure a h le.
    via u/Maezymable
  • 12
    dresses_212_1... Did you run NYC today? Congratulations! I hope I cheered for you while I was out there! As to this whole thing, obviously NTA. No one owns a sport and she's being absurd. She can get over it: is she whining on FB for the other 49,998 people to shut up too because it's "her thing"? It's ridiculous.
    via u/dresses_212_10028
  • 13
    StAlvis NTA feels like I'm trying to take over something that's special to her. Hobbies aren't a zero-sum game.
    via u/StAlvis
  • 14
    Your personal enjoyment does not take away enjoyment from someone else.
    via u/StAlvis
  • 15
    Glittering_Sea... NTA. ? She thinks she owns running? Also, it sounds like it's not the running she wants per se, but the likes and comments on her FB post.
    via u/Glittering_Search_41
  • 16
    Somewhere_in... NTA and why are you friends. with someone like this?
    via u/Somewhere_in_Canada1
  • 17
    TaniaYukanana - NTA. Spoiler your friend doesn't actually like running, she likes getting artificial validation from others on social media. That's her thing. If she actually enjoyed running, she'd have been doing it a lot more than a week before.
    via u/TaniaYukanana
  • 18
    Traditional gym bunny saying: You will never be criticized by anyone doing more than you, only less.
    via u/TaniaYukanana
  • 19
    mfdoorway I literally don't need to read it. Running isn't her thing, she can get over it. NTA
    via u/mfdoorway
  • 20
    Battlepuppy Nta This is not about you and is a 100% about her. She wants people in your friend group to ooh and aaw over her accomplishments. Her accomplishments in your friend group will no longer be unique if someone else is doing it too.
    via u/Battlepuppy
  • 21
    She desires to be the center of attention and to have her identity around running this marathon You're showing up and saying: hey look this is not unique or special because I'm a second person doing it, therefore she is not unique and special.
    via u/Battlepuppy
  • 22
    You are not actually saying this, this is what she thinks you are doing. People who do this don't have a lot of self confidence, think little of themselves and are fragile.
    via u/Battlepuppy
  • 23
    A confident person would welcome you into their interest so that they could converse with you on it. But she sees you as stealing her thunder.
    via u/Battlepuppy
  • 24
    A confident person would be happy you are doing this and would then have conversations about running shoes or nutrition or hydration or training schedules and all that other fun jazz. This is very immature behavior, she is emotionally immature, and should find another way to regulate her self image, other than going. after praise.
    via u/Battlepuppy

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friendship post race friends facebook posts running social media marathon
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